While the diagnosis filled me with hope initially, it has proven disappointing in the end. I got hopeful because I figured that if now we knew what the problem was, we could surely fix it. And also because the books, the articles, everything I read about Adult ADHD seemed to indicate that it is a very "treatable" condition. After three months though, I do not see the light. Things have improved a little since DH started taking medication, to be sure. But not nearly enough. And my biggest worry, our children, continue to be exposed to the chaos, the lack of consistency, the lack of emotional connection, the unpredictability, the yelling, the name-calling... from their father.
As I right this, I can hear my husband yelling at our daughter M "what is the definition of a square?!?!?!?! three times in a raw, ever so louder. She says "daddy there is a fire!" (he is making dinner, one and a half hours late) " I KNOW THERE IS A FIRE, I AM TRYING TO PUT IT OUT!! HOW MANY SIDES DOES A SQUARE HAS????!!!" They say a person with ADD is like a dog with a bone, they won't let go of the bone, no matter what.
A couple of weeks ago, in a situation like this, I would have gone to the kitchen and intervene. I would have tried to calm him, to point out that he was yelling. But then, the accusing and name calling would have turned to me. He would have told me that the reason our daughters don't listen to him is because they know they can always get away with anything with me. Because I spoil them.
It has nothing to do with him. With the fact that he calls them "moron"
Have to quit, M is here
